Rev. to NJ church leaders: Thou shalt not Facebook

In a story that highlights the absurdity of religious ignorance about sex and relationships, the Rev. Cedric Miller is urging his congregation to delete their Facebook accounts because, he says, "the temptation" that the website offers to commit adultery "is just too great," AP writer Wayne Parry reports. "I've been in extended counseling with couples with marital problems because of Facebook for the last year and a half," Miller, whose previous preachings advised Church members to share their Facebook password with their spouse, said. Since apparently, "If your spouse won't give you his or her password, you've got a problem," according to Pat Dawson, a minister at the church.

No word yet on whether Miller will also urge deleting your email account, disconnecting your phone, or turning down invitations to high school reunions. Because, y'know, the temptation to fuck one of your exes is just too great, and so clearly the problem in your relationship is the technology you use to meet.

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Update: As it so often happens, you are what you repress the most. In Rev. Miller’s case, that means you have extramarital sexual relationships, on multiple occasions. In 2003, Miller testified in court to having group sex with his wife and a Church assistant, testimony he confirmed this Saturday. Yup, not surprised.
Update: AP reports today that Miller will take a leave of absence following a vote by the Church regarding his position as a senior pastor. Miller says it was a “vote of confidence” that apparently also included “some restrictions that he wouldn’t list.” Sounds like he’s not just a hypocrite, but a liar, too. It seems to me like he would fit right in with the Church he’s being temporarily expelled from.

On Faith Panelists Blog: The lady doth protest too much – Debra W. Haffner

"It doesn't surprise me to see attempts to control people's sexual lives emerge in Tea Party candidates' platforms," Debra Haffner writes at the Washington Post. Issues of sexual freedom have long been a cash cow for social conservatives. "I predict we will see more Tea Party candidates start playing into some conservatives' anxieties about all things sexual in the coming year."

So what are these sexual anxieties? Christine O'Donnell has the full package: "In a 1996 interview, she spoke out in an MTV documentary against masturbation, wrongly stating that the New Testament is against it. […] In 2002, she said that 'condoms will not protect you from AIDS.' In a 2006 interview, she said that homosexuals suffer from an identity disorder. A few weeks ago, she said that she opposes abortion except if the woman is going to die, in which case her family should decide which life to save."

That's what we call really, really big government.

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Indonesia Botches Porn Blockade, Shuts Down Regular Sites – XBIZ.com

Back in 2008, to the cries of "Thank you, God!" Indonesian parliament members passed a draconian anti-pornography law. Last month, they announced their (now legal) intentions of blocking all online pornography during the holy month of Ramadan, when the religious are expected to refrain from any immoral acts, including viewing porn. (Only during that one month, I wonder?)

Unsurprisingly, the country-wide filter ran into a snag as 30 websites, including news portals, were also blocked—unintentionally, according to Indonesian Information Minister's spokesman Gatot Dewa Broto. "The speed of the operation was so huge, we hit the wrong ones," he explained, but touted that the operation had successfully shut down 80% of its intended target. The blockade is being implemented with the cooperation of the country's 300 major Internet service providers.

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Russian dairy to fire women over abortions | World | News | Toronto Sun

Wonder what the desegregation of Church and State would look like? Actually, you don't need to wonder, just look at Russian company "Russkoye Moloko" (Russian Milk), whose "ecologically safe" dairy products are sold all over supermarkets in the former Soviet Union. President of the company, Vasily Boiko-Veliky, has announced that his company will fire any woman who has an abortion because they "don’t want to work with killers," as well as any employee who refuses to be married in Russian Orthodox Church ceremonies.

Why the strict regulations? Well, "Boiko-Veliky said the record heatwave Russia has endured this summer was punishment for sin and that church weddings could improve things." Obviously. The crackpot Boiko-Veliky seems to think this will go over well: "I expect [my 6,000 employees] to be faithful and to repent," he said, adding he wants "to prevent future sins by employees" with the rules. He is apparently unconcerned his company's rules violate Russian labor law.

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Lying to get sex: Is it rape? – Violence Against Women – Salon.com

An Arab man in Jerusalem who pretended to be Jewish for the duration of wooing a woman into a quick shag now faces 18 months in prison for rape. It's rape, Jerusalem District Court Judge Tzvi Segal said, because, "If she hadn't thought the accused was a Jewish bachelor interested in a serious romantic relationship, she would not have cooperated." Therefore, the precedent in Israel is set: lying to get sex is officially rape. Israeli public defender Elkana Laist said the ruling opens "the door to a rape conviction every time a person lies regarding details of his identity." Don't you just feel all warm and fuzzy inside now?

As Tracy Clark-Flory reports, "U.S. law has expanded to allow for rape by fraud, but interpretations are fairly strict." In other words, only certain lies about one's identity—such as pretending to be someone's spouse—can be considered rape in the US. But in a theocracy like (so many countries in) the Middle East, I guess you're just as married to your religion.

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Islamic Websites Offer Halal Adult Sex Aids | Green Prophet

It's not a sex shop, insists Abdelaziz Aouragh, the 29-year-old founder of El Asira, an Internet retailer "catering to the Islamic consumer whose passions can be enhanced without violating religious law." But it's still a "major success," Aouragh told the LA Times. Other religiously-themed sex retailers make similar assertions. "It’s not a sex shop in the Western sense but a place to help married couples, and only married couples, enjoy sex to the full," Khadija Ahmed, the 32-year-old businesswoman and founder of Dar Khadija in Bahrain says. Her shop "includes edible underwear and kinky lingerie," Tinamarie Bernard reports.

Over at Examiner.com, Tinamarie says, "Unfortunately, these attitudes are incompatible with sex-positivity." Really?

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‘Touchdown Jesus’ Burns to Ground As Porn Shop Goes Unscathed

A six-story tall statue of Jesus in Ohio was struck by lightning and burst into fire, damaging a nearby Church but leaving a nearby porn shop unscathed. "Church founder and former horse trader Lawrence Bishop and his wife paid $250,000 for the statue in an attempt to help people," Dana Chivvis wrote. Maybe the 250 grand would have been more helpful?

Bigoted religious zealots are so often so quick to declare signs of God, from Pat Robinson's claim that Hurricane Katrina was divine retribution for legalizing abortion to Iranian clerics who say immodest dress cause earthquakes, that I, for one, would love to see them explain this one! Oh, wait, I already know: "A similar incident in 2007 ripped the arm and hand off a Jesus statue at a shrine in Colorado. The nuns at the shrine said the bolt was a freak act of nature and warned people from gleaning any religious significance from it."

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Christian Anti-Porn Activists Now Targeting Female "Porn Addicts" | AlterNet

If you're a woman who watches 1 hour of pornography a week or enjoys such lurid acts as masturbation, lustful thinking or self-gratification, you're a "porn addict," according to several Christian anti-porn activist groups like XXXChurch and Dirty Girls Ministries. "Now women have fallen under fire for their naughty consumption, as Anti-porn activists such as XXXChurchand Dirty Girls Ministries have targeted women for porn addiction," Lorna D. Keach writes. The refocusing on women by anti-porn activists comes at a time when women are more often consumers of porn. "According to Theresa Flynt, vice president of marketing for Hustler video,female consumers make up 56% of video sales."

Their message is similar to the one emerging from other Church groups. "It’s an injustice that the church is not more open about physical sexuality. God created sex. But the enemy has twisted it," Dirty Girl Ministries administrator Crystal Renaud says. I guess that enemy is me since I sure do masturbate!

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